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The Murderous
Little Toy
Words: Mike Roberts
Music: The Marvelous Little Toy: Tom Paxton
When I was just
a wee little lad, my Daddy brought to me
A toy he made down at the lab; it filled me full of glee!
A wonder to behold it was, with many buttons bright.
From the moment that I turned it on, it filled us all with fright.
Chorus:
It went ZAP! when it fired; it cursed when it missed,
And whirred as it took aim.
It didn't know if we were friend or foe:
It attacked us just the same.
Curiosity killed
the cat, and the dog was next to go.
The parakeet beat a fast retreat, as the wall began to glow.
A turret turned, some bullets fired, and the TV was no more.
My friends, you should have seen it as the napalm hit the floor.
Chorus
It broke each
window down the hall, and then I heard it laugh.
I must admit, I chuckled when it cut my brother in half.
My sister made it to the stairs, when it caught her in the pants.
My daddy had the shotgun out but he never stood a chance.
Chorus
It fired two
mortars at the wall, and when the smoke had cleared,
I looked all around for my murderous toy, but it had disappeared!
Then I saw it leave through watered eyes; the tear-gas smelled so
sweet.
Things weren't too good for the neighborhood, as it ambled down the
street.
Chorus
Well that's the
last I ever saw of my murderous little toy.
It might be dead but I hope it's not, `cause it filled me full of
joy.
They say it reached the Bearing Strait, and crossed the icy flows.
The Russian Army ain't killed it yet, but it keeps them on their
toes.
Chorus
Well, the years
have gone too quickly now, and I've my own little boy,
And just last night I told him `bout my murderous little toy.
I recognized his crafty look; I could almost read his mind.
My son has grown up like his dad, `cause he wants one just like
mine.
Chorus
Webmistress' Note:
This song had been hosted at
The
Murderous Little Toy but
the site appears to be down permanently, which is a shame. I
consider myself smart to have copied it to my hard drive a very long
time ago. |
